Father S Day

In 1964, psychiatrist Eric Berne released his most famous book, "Games People Play. " Most people know the title more from the 1968 recording by Joe South, or from one of its many "covers" by artists as diverse as Barbara Mandrell and Jerry Lee Lewis. But more than 40 years after the book's arrival, I found myself thinking about it last Sunday, on Father's Day. The book's premise is that much of what we do is learned behavior, something passed down from generation to generation.

A generation of diaper-changing, dinner-cooking daddies are redefining what it means to be a father. Today, Father's Day, the U.S. Census Bureau estimates there are 63 million dads. But today's dads differ from the fathers of decades ago. The new batch of dads want to balance work life with family life; they want to be the parent and provider, recent studies suggest. What the numbers say Generally, dads nationwide are spending more time with their children - an average of 2.7 hours a day, compared with 1.9 hours in 1977, according to surveys by the Families and Work Institute, a nonprofit think tank in New York.

Trains for everyone Trains for children to operate, HO- and O-scale model railroads, artifacts, photos and more. Today and Sunday, 1 to 5 p.m. Hagerstown Roundhouse Museum, 300 S. Burhans Blvd., Hagerstown. $3.50 for adults; 50 cents for ages 4 to 12; free for ages 3 and younger. Call 301-739-4665. Fairplay carnival The Fairplay Volunteer Fire Co. Carnival ends today. Country singer Billy "Crash" Craddock will perform today at 6:30 and 10 p.m. Carnival grounds next to the Fairplay Volunteer Fire Co., 1802 Tilghmanton Road, Fairplay.

It never ceases to amaze me how life's footnotes have a way of keeping one's feet on the ground. I, like most people nowadays, am part of the Wow! Generation. Because of time constraints and short attention spans, we look for that huge event to leave that indelible mark on our memories. That's what Barry Bonds' 714th home run was supposed to be. That's what the final round of the U.S. Open had been over the years. It's was the world hopes the World Cup will bring over the next month.

WASHINGTON COUNTY It had been four years since Chester Magoun, 56, had been with his daughter on Father's Day. And Sunday, as he put his arm around her, Magoun said he was just glad to have her home. Amber Holland, 29, moved to Florida, but returned to Hagerstown about four days ago with her two children, 2-year-old Angela Holland and 4-year-old Xavier Holland. Magoun said he's seen his daughter only once in the four years since she moved. Like many area fathers, Magoun said he wanted to spend the day with his family and relax.

HAGERSTOWN Vijay-Kumar Solanki remembers the first night he spent with his daughter, who was 2 weeks old at the time. His large family had gathered in his apartment, each by turn holding the baby as a proud Solanki looked on. "I was thinking, I could do this. This isn't that hard," Solanki, 35, said of being a single father. "And then, the family left. " Bewilderment replaced ease as Solanki found himself alone with a crying infant and no idea what to do about it. He made it through that night and his daughter, Brenda Rhinehart - who goes by the nickname Benna - now is 10 years old. She splits her time between staying with her father and staying with her mother.

"Never give up. " That was the advice Nick Patterson's father, Ed, gave the 9-year-old this spring when he was tackling a standardized test in third grade at Paramount Elementary School. Patterson's brothers, Andrew, 7, and Jonathan, 5, said their parents tell them to live by the Golden Rule - to treat others as they want to be treated. To honor thy father this Father's Day, The Herald-Mail asked Tri-State area residents what the best advice was they ever received from good ol' dad and asked dads what advice they would give to their children.

When Katie Moore is asked what makes her dad special, she has a quick answer: "He's very understanding and he also is fabulous at what he does. " Katie's dad, Terry Moore, is a music teacher in Frederick County, Md. Katie, 15, of Smithsburg, is glad that she and her father share an interest in music. Enjoying music and performance together was the inspiration for Katie's entry in The Herald-Mail's Father's Day drawing contest. Katie sketched a portrait of herself and her dad, based on a recent picture taken of the two before they attended a performance of "The Music Man" at the Riverside Center Dinner Theater in Fredericksburg, Va. Katie was the winner of the drawing contest and will receive a $50 prize.

Teens are notoriously experimental and not always sympathetic to parental advice. But with Father's Day around the corner, teens interviewed recently at the Valley Mall in Halfway said they at least listen to advice from fathers about members of the opposite sex. Three girls from Martinsburg, W.Va., classmates at St. Joseph Parish, said their dads' advice is a big part of learning how far to go, especially romantically. "It's important to follow it," said Emily Hume, 14. Her dad's advice about prospective boyfriends is succinct: "No baggy pants.