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With love, gestures trump gadgets

May 18, 2012|Lisa Prejean

Isn't it interesting how headlines can grab your attention and draw you into a story?

Yeah, well, that's what journalists do best. We want you to read what we write, so we have to make it enticing.

Recently an online headline caught my eye. It boldly proclaimed to offer information about "Ten gadgets that help your love life."

I printed the article (for journalistic research purposes only, of course), left my computer for a few minutes and started another load of laundry. When I came back, I couldn't find the printout.

Then I noticed my husband sitting at his computer, reading the printout. (Also for research purposes only, I'm sure.)

"So, honey, are you learning anything?" I asked.

He smiled, shook his head and said, "Yeah, all these things require a SmartPhone."

Guess we're out of the loop.

Sleep sensors, apps, electronic calendars, music services, virtual cards, headphones ... so much technology to help us communicate and keep our relationships together.

What do we really need, though? Gadgets? I think not.

I prefer gestures over gadgets.

A few gestures go a long way to keep a relationship strong. Plus, they don't cost nearly as much as expensive gadgets. For example, consider these:

 A face-to-face conversation: Whenever possible, communicate in person. This will reduce misunderstandings and will build intimacy.

 A shoulder rub: Doesn't it feel good to have someone ease the stress out of aching muscles? A gentle touch goes a long way.

 A shared laugh: Everyone wants to feel witty. Why not celebrate life with your significant other? Share stories that you know will lighten the load that your loved one carries.

 A candle: Light a candle and allow the aroma to fill the room as you talk about your day. What is your sweetheart's favorite scent? If you don't know, now is a good time to discover it. (My husband likes anything that smells like cookies. I like the smell of coffee. A good combo ....)

 A hug: Hold on to each other as if you never want to let go.

 A spoken promise: Talk about your faithfulness, loyalty and love, and then live it, especially when the going gets tough.

Sometimes work takes us apart, but we need to make time to be together ... not just virtually via the use of gadgets, but side by side.

Romantic gestures require being in the same room with the one you love.

It's the best place to be, with or without a SmartPhone.

Lisa Tedrick Prejean writes a weekly column for The Herald-Mail's Family page. Send email to her at

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