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Mail Call - April 11

April 11, 2011

“It’s so obvious that God loves humor and laughter. He put it in us, so I imagine God himself loves a good laugh. After all, it has been proven that laughter is good for our health and our spirit. So here’s a joke for the day. No one be offended — it’s just a joke. Here’s the joke: You want to make God laugh? Make a plan.”

— Clear Spring



“Joke of the day: Latest news is that President Obama is starting his next campaign for the presidency within the next three weeks. My question is this: When has he done anything but campaign? It is obviously the only thing he knows how to do. He has no problem saying what he will do. Unfortunately, he ignores the difference between saying and doing.”

— Falling Waters, W.Va.



“On Saturday, March 19, of this year, my sister, daughter and I attended a Ladies of Valor conference at the Ringgold Church of Christ. There was no charge, and they fed us breakfast and lunch, and also snacks. We would like to thank Gina ... for inviting us, and Earlene, who hosted the conference. All who attended were blessed by the singing and testimony ... the ... videos were great. Thank you, Ringgold, for that day of women’s ministry, and all the goodies, too. May God bless.”

— Williamsport



“Oh, Tim, what did you hope to accomplish with that tasteless article you wrote about the gay marriage bill being defeated? When you use the marriage card as a cause for that failed gay marriage bill, you ripped into a lot of married families that consider marriage sacred. Is there something you don’t understand about the word ‘marriage?’ You know, the legal union of husband and wife. What dictionary are you using? If the word ‘marriage’ would have been taken out and ‘legal union’ substituted, that bill would have passed with flying colors.”

— Clear Spring



“Everyone has an opinion. Opinion on issues are always debatable. Tim Rowland’s opinion on legislative decision to stop gay marriage in Maryland is off-base. He may have thought he had hit a home run, but he failed to pass third. When the powers-that-be checked, he missed the bag; therefore, was called out.”

— Hagerstown



“With the arrival of spring, the flowers are starting to bloom around the fountain at Park Circle, City Park. What a great gift to the community from the Hagerstown Garden Club. Soon the water in the fountain will begin to flow, thus hiding the figures of the beautiful women supporting the fountain. What a shame. Welcome, spring.”

— Hagerstown



“I just have a hard time dealing with these people who are embezzling money. I was an auditor for 10 years, and an auditor does nothing but audit books. Where were these companies having — were they having their books audited? If they were doing a good audit, then they should have picked up on the money ... they don’t realize, not only are they taking and stealing, I don’t see how they can look at theirselves in the mirror in the morning.”

— Hagerstown



“The entrance to the YMCA definitely needs further review. Cars do not observe the 30 mph speed limit unless there’s a police car visible. The traffic is very heavy — perhaps not at all times, but often enough. I live on the North End and I’m quite aware of the need to turn in and out. It’s almost, well, it’s always difficult. A stoplight with the possibility of maybe flashing instead of operating at all times, flashing only when there’s lighter traffic, would definitely be an improvement — or possibly even better, another location.”

— Hagerstown



“Herald-Mail ... you keep — in there always about West Virginia, Pennsylvania, talking about the budget deficit, teachers want more money and all. Tell West Virginia and Pennsylvania move to Maryland. When you pay only $1,400 a year in property taxes on an average, move to Maryland, see what you pay. I got a good fix: Sacrifice. Everybody’s got to have a share of sacrifice.”

— Leitersburg



“You know, I cannot believe this group of candidates for the GOP party, for the president of the U.S. They must have all come from the funny farm. I mean, they’re not serious, they’re not statesmen, and even the one that’s probably going to run is Sarah Palin, and she couldn’t even finish out her full term of governorship.”

— Hagerstown



“Oh, happy day. After all these years, I finally see it in print, from the Smithsburg caller, about blowing your nose at the table. Rude behavior, lack of upbringing. Just like spitting on the sidewalk.”

— Monrovia, Md.



“I wish they would do something about the TV. You turn the TV on, the same thing’s on today that was on yesterday. The commercial comes on, first thing you know, the program comes on and two seconds later the ads are back on, the same thing time after time. I’ve had my car insurance 41 years and I’m sick of hearing about it. I mute the ads when they’re coming on. The program is so low and the ads are so high. The ones over and over again, half of them don’t make sense.”

— Hagerstown



“Don’t be an April fool, slow down when you’re near a school.”

— Hagerstown

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