Where are the 'Gorey' details on this breakup?

June 02, 2010|By TIM ROWLAND

Married people go their separate ways all the time, so how come major issues such as the global debt crisis, the BP oil spill and the length of Taylor Swift's miniskirt have all taken a back seat to the breakup of Al and Tipper Gore?

So far, anyway, there's no scandal to it. None of the typical politician hijinks that we've all come to know and love.

No wide stance. No "hiking on the Appalachian Trail." No "Sorry about carrying on with your wife and all, but maybe this six-figure payout will ease the pain." No sniveling man at the podium expressing remorse for "transgressions," while his wife stands by his side looking as if she'd just taken a drink of bad milk.

Nope, they're just going their separate ways.

So, if you had Bill and Hillary Clinton in the "First Prominent Democrats to Get Divorced" pool, you lose. Jeepers, even Elliot and Silda Spitzer are still hanging on by a thread.


"This is very much a mutual and mutually supportive decision that we have made together following a process of long and careful consideration," the Gores wrote. "We ask for respect for our privacy and that of our family, and we do not intend to comment further."

Your first thought on seeing a statement like this is: He's gay. You're second thought is: She's gay. And your third thought is: They just figured out that they're actually first cousins.

But none of this applies. And they sure (Oh wait, I need to insert my apology here for failing to respect their privacy in accordance to their wishes) they sure seemed to be getting along, at least as evidenced on nomination night by The Kiss.

That was the liplock that went on for roughly the same amount of time it takes to assemble a child's swing set.

There were generally two reactions to The Kiss: 1. "Oh, I think it's wonderful that two people can express their true feelings in an open and honest way in front of everyone." 2. Well, people in this group considered it to be the biggest televised ralph since Kramden.

These two camps could further be expressed as 1. Women and 2. Men.

And speaking of the latter, as a male, it makes me feel pretty insecure as to the prospects of marriage. I mean, if an Academy Award and a Nobel Prize aren't enough to hold a woman's interest, what chance do I have, short of announcing that I am the Lost Dauphin, true heir to the throne of France?

Of course, maybe watching your husband jet all over the world telling people that the sky is falling isn't as romantic as it sounds. Or maybe he could never get over his addiction to rock music with profane lyrics.

Either way, for the next two weeks we'll all be treated to those entertainment stories about how politics is hard on a marriage. Could be. It could also be that people who can't hold it together in government can't hold it together at home, either.

But in this case, I think you really have to respect Al and Tipper for breaking up, not because they were forced into it by some marital train wreck, but because -- well, because they admit that they love and respect each other.

Yes, but doesn't that mean...? I mean, wouldn't it...? Oh forget it. This is politics. It makes as much sense as anything.

Tim Rowland is a Herald-Mail columnist. He can be reached at 301-733-5131, ext. 2324, or via e-mail at Tune in to the Rowland Rant video under, on or on Antietam Cable's WCL-TV Channel 30 at 6:30 p.m. New episodes are released every Wednesday.

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