Syd takes a drive into prognostication purgatory

September 16, 2009|By BIG SYDNEY

It goes to show you, you can't disobey that great philosopher, Mick Jagger.

He once sang, "You can't always get what you want ..." and boy, was he right. It doesn't matter if it's greener on the other side, there is still fertilizer involved.

Last week, I was getting a prognosticating block. My Syd-mic powers were so low, I was standing on them.

So, I decided to get away from my home in scenic Dargan and take a drive to clear my head, but I didn't know where to go.

I went over to the town's new business featuring vegetables in metal cans and Automobile Club service -- better known as the Canned Food Drive -- and plot a course to fresh air and mental freedom.


My travel agent, Helen Weels, sent me on a quick trip to Central Pennsylvania. It was supposed to be a one-tank trip, but she doesn't drive the souped-up LegaSyd.

I loaded up a few mystery meat and head cheese sandwiches and started on the drive. It got my football juices flowing.

I headed down into West Virginia, near Harpers Ferry, and decided that a Virginia school would make a Broad Run past Jefferson and Washington would shock the world and knock off Sherando.

I drove up U.S. 340 into Frederick and suddenly got the urge to take Thomas Johnson over Martinsburg.

I cruised past Walkersville on U.S. 15 and figured Smithsburg would make a run at the Lions.

I was only a half-hour into the trip and I needed to pull over. I was over at Cunningham Falls and thought it was a sign to take North Hagerstown to knock off Frederick. While I was there, I got some air in the tires and it made me think of the inflated hopes of Hancock, so I chose the Panthers to down Saint James.

As I approached the Maryland-Pennsylvania line, I drove past Emmitsburg, the home of the Mount St. Mary's Mountaineers, and I caught the whiff of a couch burning in front of a frat house but took East Carolina to beat West Virginia.

I pulled off for lunch at a spot near Fairplay, Pa., which reminded me of Fairplay, Md., and Boonsboro and Williamsport. I went directional and took the Warriors to rise again over South Carroll while the Wildcats wouldn't be able to use their compass against Northern Garrett.

In Greenmount, I picked against Greencastle. In Gettysburg, I got historic and took Waynesboro.

And so it went. I got 75 miles into my trip and entered a town called York Springs, Pa.

Suddenly the LegaSyd started to sputter and buck. The oil light went on and the transmission fell out the bottom.

I was doomed and lost and stranded. I got out of the car and started looking for help. I saw a lighted sign in the distance and headed for it.

I got to the sign and I knew I was really in for a bad time. Not only did my car break down, but I found out that every pick I made was wrong.

Just my luck. I was stuck in the Bermudian Springs Triangle.

On with the predictions. Last week: 19-6 (.760). Season: 32-12 (.727).


South Carroll 38, Smithsburg 13

Williamsport 30, Poolesville 18

North Hagerstown 20, Loch Raven 14

South Hagerstown 29, Catoctin 27

Middletown 21, Boonsboro 20

Clear Spring 33, Hancock 20

Urbana 41, Jefferson 12


Mercersburg Academy 20, Landon 10

Frankfort 28, Berkeley Springs 21

James Wood 44, Hedgesville 18

Hershey 27, Waynesboro 13

Greencastle 34, Shippensburg 21

Martinsburg 33, Briar Woods 28

Susquenita 40, James Buchanan 7


Harrisburg 31, Chambersburg 13

Bishop Walsh 41, Saint James 20


Maryland 27, Middle Tennessee State 14

Penn State 48, Temple 14

West Virginia 31, Auburn 27

Shepherd 28, Seton Hill 13


Redskins 23, Rams 10

Chargers 17, Ravens 13

Steelers 20, Bears 10

The Herald-Mail Articles