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Halloween research produces mixed bag of treats

November 03, 2005|by BIG SYDNEY

I'm always looking for that edge to keep me on top as the best overweight football prognosticator with the initials B.S. that is published on Thursday in a daily newspaper that has two editions with the letters MH and DM in the country.

Point spreads and Rock, Paper and Scissors will only get you so far. To be good, you have to get inside the people surrounding the games. You have to get them where they live, at least until you get thrown out for stalking and raiding their fridge.

But that's another time and another column.

I decided to take a new angle this week. With it being Halloween and all, I figured I would dress up and go trick-or-treating to see what some sporting figures were handing out to the kids.

I don't think I was detected. I wore coaching shorts, a whistle, a baseball cap and a T-shirt with my belly hanging out. I went as Big Sydney. No one would have guessed that I would go as myself.

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The funny thing, though, is because of the T-Shirt, a lot of people asked me if I was a North Hagerstown football fan.

I did my part for the kids first, though. I stayed at the Dargan compound and handed out treats to the kids. Imagine the looks on their faces when they saw the string head cheese and Spam kisses as they went through their candy bags.

So here's the results of the research.

  • Redskins coach Joe Gibbs - He gave a little of everything, but strangely enough, nothing was purchased at a Giant. As a matter of fact, he got nothing from a Giant at all.

  • Hagerstown Suns general manager Kurt Landes - He was handing out little bottles of Sunny D. Ever the promoter, he had his 2006 schedule on the sides of the bottles. The kids were confused, they thought Sunny D was a rap artist.

  • The Dargan chess team handed out some goodies. Ironically, they were boxes of Nerds.

  • NBC25 sports anchor Josh Reed did some networking by handing out TV dinners.

  • Ravens coach Brian Billick was embarrassed by his team's season and gave out Milk Duds.

  • The same could be said for Yankees owner George Steinbrenner who had tons of Cry Babies. Then, later on, he tried to buy kids over to his side with One Hundred Grand and PayDay bars.

  • That young basketball player named Anthony out in Denver handed out Carmello. He has been taking lessons from Landes when it comes to promotions.

  • I stopped by to see Jose Canseco and he gave kids a choice of either Juice Boxes or Juicy Fruit gum.

  • Ray Lewis didn't have much imagination with his Crunch bars.

  • Vikings coach Mike Tice was rather on the cheap side. He gave the candy that was left over from some boat trip his team took. All he had left was some Sugar Babies.

  • The one that hit the closest to home, though, was the San Francisco 49ers. Their handout told the most about who they are and how to pick in games they play.


They gave out turnovers, like they have every Sunday this season.

On with the predictions. Last week 21-4 (.840), season 165-60 (.733).

HIGH SCHOOLS

Today

Winters Mill 24, Tuscarora 14: That run of the Mill offense is more than the Titans can handle.

Friday

North Hagerstown 27, Catoctin 21: Hubs stay hot thanks to a Thurm-miss.

Boonsboro 38, South Hagerstown 15: You can't flip-flop when it comes to Shoemaker.

Smithsburg 53, Clear Spring 20: Even with spotty play, the Leopards are too much for the Blazers.

Brunswick 30, Williamsport 12: Q. How does a Railroader drink Gatorade? A. They chug, chug, chug.

Linganore 23, Thomas Johnson 13: A round table discussion helps the Lancers a lot.

Frederick 28, Walkersville 18: Cadets beat Walkersville out of the gait.

South Carroll 31, Middletown 17: It's getting late for the Mid-Knights.

Berkeley Springs 41, Hancock 21: It's easy for the Indians' defense. All it has to do is follow a Trail.

Greencastle 27, Shippensburg 12: Everyone yells, "Go Greyhounds," and then leaves the driving to the Blue Devils.

Jefferson 31, Waynesboro 14: Indians' hands become sore because they can't rope Burns.

Maryland School for the Deaf 48, Model School 13: Math is a popular subject at Model School. Everyone likes working on their figures.

Saturday

Bishop McDevitt 40, Chambersburg 17: When the Crusaders need extra points, they put them on their McDevitt card.

Scotland 30, James Buchanan 28: Scotland knocks Rockets off kilt-er.

St. John's at Prospect Hall 19, St. James 18: It's Christmas for the Vikings. They win because of injuries and old Saints nicks.

Mercersburg Academy 26, Kiski School 15: After last week's loss, Bullis was heard to yell at the Blue Storm, "Miss me. Miss me. Now you got to Kiski."

COLLEGES

Penn State 21, Wisconsin 17: The Nittany Lions are the easy picks because the date on the side of the Badgers' helmets has expired.

Shepherd 42, West Virginia State 14: It's time for Shepherd to pack up the old Rambler and ramble off to take care of their playoff ramifications.

PROS

Bengals 31, Ravens 13: Baltimore is in the market for a win, but walks into a stripe maul.

Steelers 27, Packers 17: No matter what recipe Green Bay tries for winning, they can't give Favre any fond due.

Eagles 24, Redskins 10: Giants ... Eagles ... This has been no shopping spree for the Redskins.

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