· Gov. Ehrlich's proposed "flush tax" draws criticism from Washington County residents who say their septic systems aren't responsible for pollution, and from Montgomery County residents, who say "our sewage is worth a lot more than $2.50."
March 17 - In more positive news for people who fear higher taxes, the State of Maryland raises vehicle registration fees to $128, and the Berkeley County (W.Va.) Commission raises 911 fees to $2.75 a call. Both moves are strongly protested by Kirstie Alley.
· An embarrassed General Assembly scraps its Big Band proclamation and corrects it to honor Roger Miller.
April 2 - Washington County Commissioners agree to hire a zoning inspector to cite "untidy" properties. Hagers- town, meanwhile, deals another blow to higher taxes by raising fees on a basket of items, including a charge to "hire a police officer to supervise a school dance."
· A puzzled Williamsport High School student detects a malfunction in Kitty's "off" switch.
April 3 - Due to a clerical error, the Social Security numbers, birth dates and other private information of 2,500 Washington County teachers are posted on the school system's Web site.
· In the spirit of cooperation, Washington County hospital officials accuse the City of Hagerstown of "economic guerilla warfare."
April 4 - Hagerstown business icon Merle Elliott is roasted at a gala affair held by the Hagerstown Community College Foundation. Amid all the mirth and laughter, no one notices "Kitty" watching silently through a crack in the curtains.
· The parents of Little Butch scratch their heads when he mysteriously is issued 2,500 Visa cards.
· Panic breaks out at BWI Airport when a passenger slips Kirstie Alley past a security checkpoint.
April 7 - In the spirit of cooperation, Hagerstown Mayor William Breichner refuses to allow a hospital spokesman to speak at a public meeting.
· Washington County Schools Superintendent Betty Morgan apologizes for a gaffe that allowed the Web posting of 2,500 teachers' Social Security numbers, saying the system only meant to post their marital status and nighttime phone numbers.
April 8 - Because of "serious problems that law enforcement alone can't handle," the General Assembly legalizes the use of police surveillance cameras on metropolitan highways.
· Senate President Mike Miller issues a proclamation honoring Mike Miller.
April 10 - Washington County residents are disturbed to find promotional fliers for the Ku Klux Klan tucked in their front doors.
· The General Assembly legalizes the use of surveillance cameras on Betty Morgan.
April 14 - With no cell phone in reach, Washington County Commissioner John Munson settles for calling Humane Society of Washington County board president Dana Moylan "rude," adding "I don't like her."
· Washington County passes a fee on handing out Klan literature.
· In keeping with the national sentiment against higher taxes, the Humane Society of Washington County proposes hiking its adoption fees to $90 per dog and $75 per cat. For some reason, this seems to irritate Kitty the Robot.
April 21 - Looking for ways to address an impending funding crisis at the Humane Society, Commissioners President Greg Snook suggests putting animals to sleep at a faster rate.
· Police in Washington County are awarded a $5,000 state grant to crack down on the crime of jaywalking.
April 23 - City and hospital officials meet behind closed doors for more than two hours, with survivors reporting good progress has been made toward a compromise.
· In keeping with the national sentiment against higher taxes, Washington County boosts its landfill fees. Sensing an impending funding crisis, nervous landfill workers ask Greg Snook if this means they are going to be put to sleep.
· A murdering crack dealer's 20-year reign of terror ends when he fails to stay inside the lines of the crosswalk.
May 1 - The lake at Greenbrier State Park opens for the season with a clean bill of health after 76 people reported getting sick from swimming last spring.