There's nothin' to do in Washington County?

Brother, have we got ideas for you!

Brother, have we got ideas for you!

April 02, 2002|BY Aaron Michael and Justin Warner

Do you find yourself torn between Maury (Povich) and Jerry (Springer) as the sole occupants of your free time? Are you tired of not having anything to do? Sorry, but we don't feel ya, brother.

We've done a little polling recently, and the vast majority of teens in the area have confirmed that "there ain't nothin' to do in this here town," and that "we need more places to hang out." As much as we would like to agree and write a column bashing this "boring" city, we simply don't feel the same way.

Without trying to sound like our (gasp!) parents, we don't think teens in the area realize how good they've got it. So, we've decided to muster up some generosity and tell local teens what to do with their seemingly boring lives.

Geographically speaking, there isn't really a reason for all of us to be complaining. We're only a trite phrase away from anywhere on the eastern seaboard. We've got the nation's capital, the beach, a major harbor, good seafood, theme parks, and ourselves, all in your big backyard - yet we still find plenty to complain about.


Rather than complaining about "this here hick town," we should be glad we don't live in some unincorporated town in southeastern Nebraska. Do you know what they do for fun there? Exactly. Ask any Nebraskan (if he isn't busy tilling his land or some other form of Nebraskan entertainment) what he's done for entertainment. Chances are, he hasn't done any of the things that you could be doing - short of visiting the "world's largest fiberglass prairie dog."

All of the things that an average Nebraskan can't do, you can do with only a little bit of driving... but there are plenty of things for you to do here in

Hagerstown. With factory outlets and a mall that are roughly the size of most third world countries, theaters, arcades, pool halls, bowling alleys, skating rinks, and best of all (sarcasm intended) Barracuda's, there should be no real reason for the lack of entertainment in Hagerstown. It's simply disgusting that with 10 square miles of suburban sprawl, local teens still can't find "nothin' to do." Perhaps it's not really the area, perhaps it's the population. (Whoa, what a concept!) It boggles our collective mind as to why local teens are so adamant about expressing their inability to be entertained.

It's not like people try to keep you on your porch with a bag of Doritos and a two-liter bottle of Mountain Dew. Our fine county has provided locals with the County Commuter, an unappreciated and under-patronized transporation service. Yeah, that's right... for a meager 85 cents your lazy, unimaginative self can get anywhere in the county!

The town and county offer you a plethora of opportunites and that's not their job. Your entertainment rests solely upon your shoulders. Throughout our four years of high school we've never run out of creative and unconventional ways to have fun.

Get off the couch and do something exciting.

How about seeing how much fun you can have with a video camera. Grab a few friends, head to an abandoned barn, let the film roll and the fun begin. You may end up with a bloody head wound, but making home movies will keep you and anyone who watches them entertained for hours. And maybe your flick will be the next "Blair Witch Project."

Don't have any friends? No problem. Grab the camera and head to a public place; you'd be surprised what complete strangers will do and say when you're holding a video camera to their face. Not only will you have fun but you might even be able to solve that friend problem.

Looking for more solitary fun? You'd be surprised how many "unexplored" things are in your big backyard. In our short time, we've discovered a little thing we like to call "the third-world roads." This little known mess of washed-out roads off Route 40 is perfect for off-roading, mountain biking, or hiking. We've run over boulders in a 1984 Volvo that would cripple most Land Rovers.

These ideas are merely a small sampling of the cornucopia of activities that we've happened to stumble upon during our short lives. But what we're really trying to do here is not tell you what to do, but encourage you to get up and so something.

So, go! Do! Build! Develop! Play! Make! Explore! Produce! Create, but whatever you do, don't procreate, because if you're hooked on Maury, chances are your gene pool could use a little chlorine.

Aaron Michael and Justin Warner are seniors at South Hagerstown High School and are never bored.

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