Mail Call

January 29, 1998

"Considering the present state of affairs with President Clinton, one of the things that makes this country great is that a person is innocent until proven guilty. Much, if not all of these accusations could be purposefully malicious against the president. The Republican party cannot be trusted either. Remember Tricky Dick?"

"Big Bill Clinton - a real man's man."

"I would like to say happy birthday to Gregg. You've been the love of my life since 1983 and you always will be."

"Make congressional representatives pay for their haircuts and postage. After all, you do. Make the rich pay their fair share in taxes. End plutocracy in America. Let's get America back."

"Did it occur to anyone else but me that maybe Monica and Linda were in a conspiracy to bring down the president? Monica's mother is a book author and Linda's friend in New York is in the business also. There's big bucks in books sales."


"This picture of Greencastle Square brings back fond memories of when you could park in the square and shop. Hagerstown has the brick ice skating square and nowhere to park and nowhere to shop. After spending all this money to beautify the square, how will it benefit the downtown merchants?"

"Good afternoon Mail Call. In Washington we have all kinds of 'gates' going on. Now President Clinton, he's come up with another 'gate.' It's called Zippergate."

"Believe me Hillary, the problem with your husband has nothing to do with a right-wing conspiracy. Check under the bed, baby."

"Follow the liberal brick road, follow the liberal brick road, follow the liberal brick road. Follow, follow, follow, follow, follow the liberal brick road. Oh what a wonderful whiz he is, he is, he is, he is. Follow, follow, follow, follow, follow the liberal brick road."

"Clinton is not as bad as some of the other presidents that have been in the White House. Everyone upholds John Kennedy. Well, JFK ran around on his wife and everyone knows it and he had parties in the White House and nothing is ever said about all that or all the others. I don't believe Clinton is guilty and I think that everyone who has been president has done something."

"Mr. Freeman deserves the support of every American for standing up for his and our Constitutional right. To refresh your memory, he was arrested at the request of a bureaucrat that did not like his message in front of the courthouse a few weeks ago. Suppose you were protesting against the County Commissioners in front of courthouse or at a public meeting. What is stopping the same bureaucrat from ordering your arrest? His arrest will help ensure our freedom from bigoted and overzealous bureaucrats."

"Beware ladies, use caution when confiding in your friend. She may be wired."

"Can anyone tell me why if charities need money so bad that they hold your check sometimes for five or six months? Thank you and I sure would appreciate an answer."

"I'd like to know if anyone can explain to me why the city feels the need to flush my hydrants? What's the purpose?"

"Wouldn't it be nice one day to pick up Mail Call and have all nice positive calls in there? Have a nice day."

"Could you tell me why the state of Maryland officials who are in charge of wire tapping or whoever's responsible for that, would drop the charge against Linda for wiring this intern at the White House where it's against the law here in Maryland. I bet you if I did something like that they'd charge me. Sounds a little fishy to me."

"Hello Mail Call. Last Thursday on a talk show Sonny Bono's mother and second wife were being interviewed. Did you know that Sonny cheated on Cher three times? She actually caught him and he was a Republican no less. No one cared then and no one cares now so why pick on Clinton?"

"Hello Mail Call. Whoop-de-do! The Republican Senate can spend millions of dollars on a witch hunt but we can't afford classrooms for our children. They're so crowded that they can't even learn to read. I'm sure Hillary can take care of Bill Clinton. Remember how they attacked her when she was trying to do something about health care?"

"Yes, hello Mail Call. I'm calling in reference to the article about Clinton's sex life. What does it have to do with his running the country? I think he's doing a fine job of it. Besides, what goes on in his personal life is his business as long as he's running the country right."

"Mail Call, does anybody out there know if there's another profession that makes so many mistakes as weathermen do? If they do, I'd like to know about it because I think they send them to dumb and dumber school."

"If Hillary doesn't care what Bill does, why should I? And another thing, Bill's a product of the '60s. Remember free love and open marriages? In the '90s this generation with the help of television knows nothing about anything but sex, sex, and more sex. They don't know anything about morals and what's right or wrong."

"Happy birthday Brittany. We love you. From mom and dad, sister and brother."

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