"Bill and Hillary - now isn't that a pair for you? They make Bonnie and Clyde look like a bunch of amateurs but then they've got the best attorney that the government can buy - Janet Reno. But wait a minute, isn't Janet Reno supposed to prosecute organized crime and not defend it?"
"I was wondering if Oct. 30 is the official night for Trick or Treating in Hagerstown? I haven't seen any more about it in the paper and I was wondering if the mayor or council could answer this?"
"I was just thinking how we could teach our children, the students in our local schools a lesson in Democracy. Schedule a field trip to the County Commissioners' weekly Tuesday morning meeting and take them in during the closed session time. That would give them an idea of how Democracy really does or doesn't work."
"This is to the person or persons who stole the Halloween decorations off of my father's grave at Rose Hill Cemetery. I surely hope that you enjoy them. It's pretty bad though, when you have to steal from the dead."
"60 Minutes and Andy Rooney has been removed from my TV program and I would like for you to do the same."
"I'm tired of people bashing Tim Rowland and what he said about the Promise Keepers. It was the funniest thing I've read all week not to mention he's 100 percent right."
"With a column like his, we'd like to nominate Tim Rowland for mayor of Smithsburg, He's funny, smart, intelligent, isn't married and doesn't want a wife and as he says, God doesn't even want him. We'd gladly accept him and his cat Bubba in Smithsburg. The Town Hall could use a good mascot and he'd turn Smithsburg around in no time. I'm sure of it, right Tim?"
"I'd like to respond to the Saturday's edition of the paper and the Boonsboro Elementary kids forgetting their lunch money and having to eat a peanut butter sandwich. Inmates at the correctional institution do not have any money, they go every day without money and they still get to eat a well balanced meal. And as far as Skip Kauffman the mayor of Boonsboro agreeing with it, he never had children so he wouldn't know what a well-balanced meal for a child would be. I think if a child forgets his lunch money, he should be issued at least as much as a criminal. Maybe our children should become criminals so that they can get a balanced meal. Thank you very much."
"I was wondering if anyone could help me? Could someone tell me where I can find a small wooden potty chair that has a place on the side for books? I saw one at a craft show over at the Frederick Fairgrounds but I haven't been able to find another one. If you can help me please let me know through Mail Call. I would certainly appreciate it."
"I am still looking for a Girl Scout Daisy uniform. Could someone please help me? My 4-year-old needs one and she would really appreciate it if someone had one or knew of one that we could purchase at a reasonable price."
"I just have to make a comment on the TV close-ups of the crowd attending the Orioles/Indians playoffs in Cleveland. I thought I was watching the Trinity network instead of the Fox network. People with hands folded in prayer-like fashion, heads bowed, worried looks on faces, all as if divine intervention will play a role in the outcome of the game. Give me a break! Lighten up people, it's only a game and the outcome is not going to have influence on the global economy, poverty, crime or spousal abuse. Let's accept it for what it is - a game."
"With all the taxes we pay why not give each and every child in the schools of Washington County a free lunch? It's the least that should be done. We pay for everything they do or get or see, so why not give them something free in return? Think about it."
"Yes. I'm looking for a tape by Engelbert Humperdinck, music video, called 'Love Unchained'. If anyone would have one for sale I'd appreciate it if you would call me at 301-797-8220. Thank you."
"Yeah. I wish you'd put that there Mail Call in the morning paper too. We pay for our paper same as the evening paper. I think we ought to get Mail Call in that paper too. Thank you."