"To my angel. Happy 30th birthday darling. I will always love you. Baby."
"If you guys weren't so racist you wouldn't be fighting to keep the Confederate flag on your license plates. If you want to be that way move down South. We don't need it here. It really makes you look ugly."
"This is to the lady who likes and eat sweetbreads. Do you know that they are the thymus or sometimes the pancreas of a calf, lamb etc.? How could anyone eat something like that? It's totally gross."
"This is to the bunch of animals that entered the bar last Friday night. Stay home in the barn where you all belong. The air was getting pretty rank."
"You just don't understand do you? It's not the Confederate license plates, it's votes. The Motor Vehicle Administration works for the governor and the governor wants votes and there are less than 100 sets of Confederate tags out there. But there are thousands of black votes and a squeaking wheel gets the grease. Here in is a lesson in politics."
"This is Steve calling and I am the father of the young girl that was involved in the car accident Friday night down at Cool Hollow and 40. I'd just like to voice my opinion and my appreciation to the Funkstown Fire Department for their quick response and their excellent service in getting her out of the car. It was very much appreciated and I just wanted to say that publicly and I hope you print this in your paper. We would also like to give a special mention to two people that were really instrumental in being right there with my daughter at the accident scene until we could get there. We'd like to pass on thanks to Austin and Caron in a very special way. Thank you very much."
"Can someone tell me if it's OK for one of these oil change places to put a permanent label inside my car hood that won't come off advertising that they also do towing?"
"I want to thank you John for everything you've done for us. Keep up the good work. Your buddy."
"To the wonderful guy that has come back into my life. I love you with all my heart and have for over 20 years. One of these days you're going to wake up and see this for yourself and learn to trust me again. I love you with all my heart and pray that some day we will be together again for always. You are a wonderful person and you mean everything to me. Just remember that and try to forget the past. I have."
"I'm calling in regards to the idea of a fire tax. I'm all for it except the money would probably be mismanaged and spent on administration accounts and paying off debts other than actually helping the firefighters."
"Congratulations to Norman and Karen on your special day of Jan. 26. Hope you both have the best of everything in life. Your friend and neighbor."
"Please stop all this nonsense about the rebel or Confederate flag. Why is it just now being condemned? What is the purpose of all this fighting? This flag has been around for as long as I can remember and no one was offended by it before. I think that this is just something else for the blacks to be complaining about and trying to start something. And by the way, I'm black and I feel that everyone has the right to fly or wear or carry any type of flag that they choose. So let's stop all this ridiculous arguing and get on with life. Thank you."
"Well, the snow has stopped and what a sad day it is. Let's hope for a few more inches over the weekend."
"Have you ever noticed that some people just can't hold a job after being on welfare? They just don't seem to understand that they have to keep the job and work like the rest of us poor folks do. No Independence Cards, medical and dental care, AFDC or anything for us working class. They just can't seem to stay away from all those wonderful, wonderful benefits. It's about time Social Services sees these people for what they are. Sponges."